Shag (01/11/10)

I was at this bed and breakfast with some friends when I realized that my left earring was missing. SHIT!! This B&B had tall shaggy carpets and I had been in and out of like every room in the place.

I got down on my hands and knees and started searching the carpet for the 10 gauge SSS bead ring (That's stainless steel body jewelry, FYI). I found a bead! I didn't remember my bead being so large, and threaded... it's not my bead. I put it in my pocket and continue searching for mine. A moment later I find a barbell sans threaded beads that did not match the bead I had in my pocket. Mmkay.... An hour or so later I had been to a few rooms and I had a growing pile of disarticulated body jewelry. There were barbells, bead rings, beads with crystals, nostril screws... etc. If I just ran out and got some needles I could have opened up my very own unsanitary piercing studio.

I don't know how all this jewelry could have been lost in the first place. I mean, I know that there is a carpet and that you would not hear your nut rings clank on the floor, but you would probably notice that your nut sack felt 1/4 lb lighter, right? After all that pain and expense of getting your nut sack pierced you'd search everywhere for your giant missing nut rings.

I eventually find my missing earring (I assume it's mine anyways because it's the same basic size as the ring in my other ear) and it's been stepped on and bent a little. Well damn, I guess I need to go buy another one.