I'm on a long ass flight to somewhere. I'm on the left side of the plane in the B seat. Some guys are in the A (window) and C (aisle) seats. In the row ahead of me is Demi Moore. She turns around in her seat and asks if she can open my shirt. Um, Ok....? She uses this weird razor blade contraption on the end of her fingernail to slice through my shirt. It not slashed off, it's just more of a v-neck now. It seemed dumb. Then she fucking slashes at my exposed skin. How did she even board the plane with a razor?
I start getting away and she starts slashing at random passengers and yet the only person who seems to mind this is me. There is a struggle and my arms get all slashed up but I do manage to knock her out. I demand an emergency landing.
I need alot of stitches.
The passengers were gathered together afterwards for a debreifing of sorts. The gangster dudes who sat down near me were angry and sympathetic about my wounds but other than that no one seemed to care. I knew Demi was lurking in that crowd of passengers to finish the job.
Aqua Teen Hunger Force cared. I got them to hide me and also I made out with Master Shake (WTF??). When 4-story-tall Demi came to get me I was hidden in an invisiblity force field bathtub. She destroyed the house but I wasn't anywhere to be found.
She's such a bitch.
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