4.03.2008

Bigfoot (3/28/08)

I was hanging out with a friend when bigfoot abducted me. My friend ended up getting his neck broken by bigfoot. Bigfoot is an asshole. I am taken to his house and put in a cage that is poorly made (probably by bigfoot). In a neighboring cage is a teenage girl. She asks me my name. I tell her my name is Tal. She says it sounds like it's from the future. She is half right, it is from the future, and also from outer space, because that is where I am from. I don't tell her this of course, I just shrug and smile. There are also in the room with us a caged preteen boy, and a caged woman of about my age.

Bigfoot returns to us wearing a tie and what looks like a buisiness suit that ripped apart when he tried to put it on. Weird. It is communicated to us that we are to fill certain roles in this house. I'm the wife, the teens are our children, the other woman is the maid. Also weird. With my cool futuristic outerspace powers I learn that this big foot used to be a man with a wife and 2 kids and a maid, but they all died mysteriously from broken necks, except for him, he was the victim of an experiment gone wrong. While helping the new maid clear off the table for dinner we discover the old maid's severed head. We probably needed to get out of there before we ended up the same way.

While dinner was being made I invisibly teleported to a neighboring house to telepathicly communicate to the owner that we needed like a lot of police and maybe some navy seals next door.

I return to bigfoot's house for dinner. I'm really hoping the cops get there before I have to preform any wifely duties with this guy. The teens are starting to freak out. The maid is already conspicuously absent. The doorbell rings and the man of the house, bigfoot, goes to answer it. It's all our neighbors coming over to say hi. Bigfoot tries to be a good host despite the fact that dinner is being interupted and stuff. The neighbors gather around him and stab him. He goes to the floor and dies. We are free.

No comments: